"It is in the economy of identities that we become defined by our aptitudes, proficiencies, and powers. In this economy, "we are what we are good at," whether it be sports, relationships, or cooking. Personally, I feel as if I constantly find identity in my perceived capacity for knowledge, as well as my ability to communicate that knowledge.
I believe this inclination - to define ourselves by what we are good at - originates in a number of sources. For the sake of simplicity, I'm only going to cover the two that immediately struck me as applicable in my own context. The first sources is purely worldly and rational: it is capitalism. A spate of unabashedly Marxist analysis has led me to the conclusion that we're raised with the constant assurance that we're "special" in some particular way, that we're especially "good" at something - able to contribute to society in some "unique" fashion. While this type of affirmation, during early childhood, may be solely meant to add some character to an otherwise blank slate, by the teen years it has the primary intention of forging us into the particular cog that benefits society as a whole. As our molten identities harden, they become more and more rigidly defined; we are not developed into malleable substances, but of hard, brittle material. When this metaphorical casting process ends, the ability of our identities to evolve further is severely limited; indeed, the only alternative to remaining in a hardened state is crumbling - total brokenness.
This first source - capitalism - is close to universally applicable. Most countries have adopted the Western capital-driven economic model to some extent, and one gets the feeling that those that haven't are only stalling. The second source I'd like to highlight applies to a narrower (but not too narrow) sub-group: Christians. It is particularly relevant to those Christians convicted of the paramountcy of God's Word as revealed in the Scriptures. My experience growing up in an evangelical, somewhat "fundamentalist" atmosphere nurtured within me a belief that each individual is endowed with a unique "spiritual gift," which, accordingly, could be utilized in performing certain applicable acts of service within the community of the Church. Common interpretations of passages such as Ephesians 4:7-16 can cause the adherent to identify solely with his perceived strengths; in this way, interpretations of these "spiritual gifts" can play a similar role in personal and extra-personal perception as notions of specialization within capitalist systems. Believers are subjected to a refining process (e.g. "discipleship") in which they are tempered to perform a certain set of tasks, usually in pursuit of an ultimate "mission." In this sense, their perceived possession of such gifts becomes central to their identities not only as Christians, but also as people in general (exasperated by the fact that many evangelical Christians confine themselves almost exclusively to their church community).
The alternatives to the first "source" - capitalism - are notably scarce. As previously stated, most human cultures are careening full-speed ahead towards specialization-based economies, if they aren't there already. And even if systems such as socialism became ubiquitous, increased agency and determinism on the part of the state would have very similar effects on the "designations" of people, ala Huxley's Brave New World.
On the other hand, Christian spirituality offers an alternative to the "dictatorship of spiritual gifts" previously described. Prior to the passage previously referenced is a preface - Ephesians 4:1-6 - which proclaims the united identity we have with God and the Church. It is in this encounter with God, who is "above all and through all, and in [us] all," that we are meant to be defined.
A lack of realization of the identity in Christ achieved through acknowledgement of unity with Him, leads to the omnipresence of fear within the human mind. Fears of death, ostracization, and irrelevance abound. The "brokenness" I referred to earlier - not to be mistaken for the meek, humble brokenness touted in the Gospel message - represents the crumbling of confidence temporarily "propped up" by an assigned identity. Whether one attaches his identity to the expectations of a "market" community or a "spiritual" community, he always runs the risk of being overcome with the fear of failing to meet those expectations. This fear, in turn, prevents him from seeking out the power offered to him by God, which is often embodied in authentic, genuine encounters with others. Depression, anxiety, and addiction, I think, are all possible consequences of this disconnect."
Hopefully, you were able to get past some of the hyperbolic/exaggerative phraseology used in this piece (I'm especially proud of "dictatorship of spiritual gifts"). Bright-eyed and bushy-tailed after a stimulating service at Priory Park Baptist, I was perhaps a bit over-enthusiastic when I wrote it; although I could have more thoroughly edited it this time around, I wanted to fully capture the no-holds-barred charm of the rough copy. Further thoughts to follow - as usual, comments are appreciated!
